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Boeing Staff Clarify Why They Refuse To Fly In Boeing Plane

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Boeing’s popularity has suffered severe harm following a number of high-profile gear failures, together with a door panel detaching throughout an Alaska Airways flight. The Onion requested Boeing staff whether or not they would fly in a Boeing plane, and that is what they mentioned.

Mandy Smith, Manufacturing Supervisor

Mandy Smith, Manufacturing Supervisor

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“I’ve seen the issues I’ve seen. I’ve performed the issues I’ve performed.”

Janet Brown, High quality Engineer

Janet Brown, High quality Engineer

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“I’m not flying in an plane held collectively by its paint.”

Gavin Todd, Engineer

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“Why, are you carrying a wire?”

Henrietta Rios, Operations Analyst

Henrietta Rios, Operations Analyst

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“Would you fly a airplane that your coworkers constructed?”

Wealthy Conroy, Assembler

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“I forgot to place touchdown gear in one of many planes, however I don’t know which one.”

Peter Loftus, Pilot

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“The driving force’s-side door deal with broke off, so now it’s a must to climb in by the window, which is tremendous embarrassing for those who’re with a woman.”

Nicolas Alchin, Structural Analyst

Nicolas Alchin, Structural Analyst

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“I really feel safer on the human-sized pneumatic tube I constructed from my home to Cleveland.”

Dave Calhoun, CEO

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“I really can’t bear in mind whether or not any of my non-public jets are Boeings.”

Jason Clark, Duct Mechanic

Jason Clark, Duct Mechanic

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“The wings don’t even flap.”

Daniel LaFew, Human Sources Consultant

Daniel LaFew, Human Sources Consultant

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“I’m too tall to slot in the seats. That’s all, actually. And possibly I’ve laid off too many individuals.”

Ed Staverson, Meeting Technician

Ed Staverson, Meeting Technician

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“Years in the past, you’d see one or two planes a yr go away the manufacturing facility with out touchdown gear, and also you’d shrug. However today, it’s like each different airplane, and I don’t like these probabilities.”

Julia Crockett, Software program Developer

Julia Crockett, Software program Developer

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“Only a quirky love for doorways on planes.”

Derick Robinson, Engineer

Derick Robinson, Engineer

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“I’ve a strict coverage in opposition to dying the place I work.”

Leonard Moreno, Challenge Supervisor

Leonard Moreno, Challenge Supervisor

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“I desire the majesty of rail.”

Josh Mantooth, Engineer/Softball Coach

Josh Mantooth, Engineer/Softball Coach

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“I refuse to fly in a airplane made by the identical idiots who went winless throughout our firm softball staff final season.”

Ben Kelley, Procurement Agent

Ben Kelley, Procurement Agent

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“I fly Spirit, the place you’re extra prone to be killed by a passenger.”

Declan Sullivan, Structural Engineer

Declan Sullivan, Structural Engineer

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“They only don’t make duct tape like they used to.”

You’ve Made It This Far…

You’ve Made It This Far…

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